Are you always engaged in Fair Exchange?

Building-RelationshipsI have been very privileged to be traveling on an exhilarating journey through life, which has taken me to many different countries, where I have had the privilege to observe sales teams, from many different market sectors, in action. It has also allowed me to be mentored and coached by a number of really amazing people, who have shared their incredible insights and wisdom with me.

All these wonderful people have guided me to better understand business and sales strategies and advised, supported and helped me through the challenging path of successfully starting and growing a number of entrepreneurial endeavours. I can attest to the fact that the time and resources, which I have invested with these individuals, has been worth every cent.

These people have helped me to grow as a businessman, leader and as a person. Their accumulative efforts have over the years helped me to clarify my vision, create the goals I needed to support me to travel the path towards living my vision and they have taught me how to remain inspired and have the patience and tenacity I needed to support me to take the action I needed to take daily to succeed.

Stay Committed to Life-long Learning

I have travelled full circle and now I find myself in a position, where I now mentor, train and support other people. Guiding them to unlock their unlimited possibility. Although I have the privilege to try to offer to others, what so many people have shared with me, I remain a student and still have coaches, mentors myself and where possible I attend seminars to help me to continue learning and growing.

I guess what I am saying is that, never stop exploring, learning and growing. Life-long learning is a never-ending commitment, you must make to yourself. One you should remain committed to throughout your own journey, as you travel through life.

Tips from My Journey

I have been so fortunate to be touched by so many incredible people, who have shared so much valuable wisdom with me over the years. To try to give a little back, I want to use this article as a medium to reflect back, on some of the wisdom, I have been privileged to discover on my journey and to use this medium to share some of these with you. I hope that some of these simple ideas will help you too.

Mutually Beneficial Relationships

As you can imagine there is so much I want to share with you. To do this successfully, I will attempt to cover a number of different topics over the next few days and weeks.

Today I want to share the one piece of advice, which stands out the most for me, far above any other wisdom I have been privileged to learn over the past number of years. This is the most profound advice I have received. It literally changed the trajectory of my life and put me on the path to super achievement. I hope it can do the same for you.

Sustainable Success comes to those, who invest their time with the right people and who build mutually beneficial relationships with them”.

Relationships make the world go round

I guess you are sitting there thinking, that is not so profound, I have heard the adage “It is not what you know, but who you know” that really makes the difference in your life.

Well in many ways, it is about who you know and what you know. The challenge is that just knowing someone is not really going to make any difference at all.

People will only be inclined to support you or really help you, when you have invested the time to develop a mutually beneficial relationship with them. In other words, getting to know the right people is just the first step. The next and most crucial step is to “Connect” with these right people, working to develop a “Mutually Beneficial” relationship with them, in a modality of fair exchange.

The Law of Reciprocity

It is a well-known fact that people want to reciprocate and support, help or do something for you, when you have done something for them. To accelerate your success, remove the thought from your mind that people owe you something for nothing.

No one owes you anything

Too many people sit back waiting for other people, the government or their employers, to do things for them, because they feel that they deserve it. This must be the greatest mistake people can ever make. No one owes you anything. If anything remarkable is going to happen in your life, you need to set up the conditions to allow it to happen first.

It is not what happens to you that matter. It is only what happens because of you, which really makes a difference to how your future will unfold”.

Action Idea” I know this may sound a little cavalier and clinical, but believe me, if you truly want to be successful and you were not born knowing the right people or they have not miraculously crossed your path by accident. You need to look around your world and identify the right people, who can support you to create the success you want. Once you have identified them, the next step is to find innovative ways to connect with them and develop mutually beneficial relationships with them.

Learn lessons wherever you can

The first time I received the advice I want to share with you today was, when I was in my teens and I went to visit one of my school friends at his very opulent home in Bedfordview. David’s’ father owned one of the largest bearing supply companies in Africa.

I on the other hand came from a home, which was filled with love, but one, which did not have very much money at all. I was determined to not live the same financially depraved life as an adult, which I lived at the time. So seeing someone, who was living the life I wanted. I asked David’s father, the most obvious question. I asked him “How do you do so well in Life”?

David’s dad was a little taken aback by the bluntness of my question, hesitated for only a moment, before he answered. “Son he said, it is all about connecting with and building win-win relationships, with the right people” In my naïve way I thought wow, a man who has enjoyed such incredible success, can surely share greater wisdom with me than that simplistic answer, so I pressed him a little further, hoping that if I brought the question closer to home, I would get a more profound answer.

Mr. Pickersgill, I continued. “You have such a beautiful home and a really fantastic lifestyle. What advice have you got for me, so that I can achieve similar results in my life”? He laughed a little as he re-emphasized his point. “If you want to be successful and build success in every area of your life, you must identify the right people, who you can support and who can support you and then you must invest sufficient time into developing, a win-win relationship with them

Still not quite convinced that Mr. Pickersgill had shared any real wisdom with me, yet, I once again broached the subject at dinner. In my own naïve way, I thought I was asking the question in a very different way, when I said “Mr. Pickersgill, “What is your secret to such incredible success?

Mr. Pickersgill was quite curt in his response, this time, as he was growing a little irritated with my repeating the same question over and over again. In my naïve way, I thought I was quite clever in the way I posed my three “DIFFERENT” questions. When in effect I had only really asked the same question three times.

After a little thought I think Mr. Pickersgill realized my motivation for asking the same question three times and so to try to satisfy my curiosity, his answer this time was a little more detailed, this what he said.

Wisdom from Mr. Pickersgill

Success is all about relationships, but it is not just about knowing the right people, it is about connecting with them, building mutually beneficial relationships with them and finding innovative ways of supporting them in return”.

Success is about how you show up and how people see you, how they effectively describe you to other people. The story they are willing to tell others about you, must be a supportive one, a trust building one and one where they willingly edify you with other people”.

The story you tell and create around yourself, through the actions you take or fail to take, the empathy you show to others, the authentic self you project to the world and the integrity you show at all times, is reflected in the relationships you build

The story your life tells the people around you is effectively the reason people want to connect with you and why they should develop long term mutually beneficial relationships with you

Although I never got invited back to the PIckersgill home for dinner ever again, the advice I received that night has stood me in great stead throughout my life.

Closing Thoughts:

  • Success is all about building relationships with the right people
  • Always being authentic, honest and finding ways to create an atmosphere of fair exchange with them
  • Success is brought about when you become a person of substance, who others can depend on
  • Success will arrive, when you discover your authentic story and share it with the right people.
  • Success becomes inevitable when you look to give first

When you do these things there will be plenty of people, who will be willing to support you and who will be able to depend upon.

What is your story telling the world?

Are you looking for a handout or are you looking to develop mutually beneficial relationships, with the right people, where there are only winners in the relationship? When you choose the latter, success is not only possible, it is inevitable.

Connect with the right People

People will only be inclined to support you or really help you, when you have invested the time to develop a mutually beneficial relationship with them. In other words, getting to know the right people is just the first step. The next and most crucial step is to “Connect” with these right people, working to develop a “Mutually Beneficial” relationship with them, in a modality of fair exchange.

Author: Andrew Horton – Sales Training

Andrew Horton

Andrew Horton

andrew horton



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